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ot - occupied! wallstreet!

edited January 2012 in Off-Topic
Occupy! Wall Street!

Terms you need to learn prior to occupying.

CEO -- Chief Embezzlement Officer.

CFO -- Corporate Fraud Officer.

BULL MARKET -- A random market movement causing an investor to mistake
himself for a financial genius.

VALUE INVESTING -- The art of buying low and selling lower.

P/E RATIO -- The percentage of investors wetting their pants as the
market keeps crashing.

BROKER -- What my broker has made me.

STANDARD and POOR -- Your life in a nutshell.

STOCK ANALYST -- Idiot who just downgraded your stock.

STOCK SPLIT -- When your ex-wife and her lawyer split your assets
equally between themselves.

FINANCIAL PLANNER -- A guy whose phone has been disconnected.

MARKET CORRECTION -- The day after you buy stocks.

CASH FLOW-- The movement your money makes as it disappears down the
toilet.

YAHOO -- What you yell after selling it to some poor sucker for $240
per share.

WINDOWS -- What you jump out of when you're the sucker who bought Yahoo
@ $240 per share.

INSTITUTIONAL INVESTOR -- Past year investor who's now locked up in a
nuthouse.

PROFIT -- An archaic word no longer in use.

Comments

  • edited January 2012
    Howard Stern (several minutes) angry/ranting about the stock market/investing (warning: lots of cursing.) No surprise he's upset with Sirius stock, but otherwise still amusing.

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