I see mostly men posting about the lack of financial interest from their wives. Individually find out the root cause for yourself and your role in it. As Yogi said, others can guess but can be wrong. If you need help, ask another woman for the cause. There may be a few in this forum.
Great post YBB.

I don't think it is a gender issue. I think is a marital relationship issue, and what is unique in that marital relationship regarding finances and investing.

Per this source, um, it is at least part gender issue, or at least it can be stratified as such:
https://www.newyorklife.com/newsroom/2024/survey-highlights-existing-financial-confidence-and-knowledge-gaps-between-men-and-women
Excerpt (BOLD addded):
NEW YORK - The latest findings from New York Life’s Wealth Watch survey provide insights into the existing financial confidence and knowledge gaps between men and women. Confidence is the top emotion that men report feeling toward managing their household finances (45%) while stress is the leading emotion for women (38%). The survey found that women report feeling the most knowledgeable about paying bills, maintaining good credit, and saving for emergencies. However, they report feeling significantly less knowledgeable than their male counterparts about building wealth, creating investment portfolios, understanding protection products like insurance, and legacy planning.
Plenty of other stratified M/F data included in study for anyone interested in facts over opinions.
That said, the data pretty much ties to what my 40-50 years of work and investing experience has taught me and what I've posted previously here.
Aside: I worked in audit shops my entire career. By chance, the composition was generally skewed more towards women than men. Many were VERY bright people, including plenty of MBAs, CPAs and CAOs, with our reports going to upper mgmt and high level clients.
I always wanted to discuss investments, portfolios and wealth management with anyone else interested, including auditees and those to whom we reported. So did the vast majority of the men I worked under/managed. Conversely, the women, many highly educated and certified in high level finance positions, were largely uninterested, uneducated and inexperienced in wealth mgmt.
Puhleeease don't take these remarks as sexist. They are not and I am not. Take them for what they are: my real-life experiences in the financial world. These experiences are what convinced me the best way to tend to my wife's financial future if I pass first was to educate her as best I could on wealth management.

I see mostly men posting about the lack of financial interest from their wives. Individually find out the root cause for yourself and your role in it. As Yogi said, others can guess but can be wrong. If you need help, ask another woman for the cause. There may be a few in this forum.
Great post YBB.

I don't think it is a gender issue. I think is a marital relationship issue, and what is unique in that marital relationship regarding finances and investing.

I see mostly men posting about the lack of financial interest from their wives. Individually find out the root cause for yourself and your role in it. As Yogi said, others can guess but can be wrong. If you need help, ask another woman for the cause. There may be a few in this forum.
Great post YBB.

Good point BB.
I've (gratuitously) managed ports for at least 10 women over the past 40+ years. The most often cited reason from them for not wanting to manage their ports is FEAR.
Yeah, ALL CAPS! True FEAR! FEAR of all kinds of things related to management of investments or doing anything of material financial consequence.
FEAR related to investment portfolio mgmt is as really tough obstacle to overcome. But as part of managing their ports, I've had as a goal for each of them to one day be confident and capable of managing their own ports. I've only been able to do that with one woman who took over the mgmt of her port and is doing remarkably well. Conversely, with a couple of others, we know that we can only even talk to them about their ports for about five minutes before they nearly pass out or break out in hives.
Both widow's ports who had spousal written plans that we currently manage are the same:
Intense FEAR of everything related to the process, especially their own acumen
Distrust, near hatred, of their dearly departed (sic) hubbies handled their finances
Which is all to say, whatever a spouse has written in their plan for their surviving spouse stands a reasonable chance of not being executed/executed as planned due to FEAR, distrust and/or a lack of acumen.

I see mostly men posting about the lack of financial interest from their wives. Individually find out the root cause for yourself and your role in it. As Yogi said, others can guess but can be wrong. If you need help, ask another woman for the cause. There may be a few in this forum.
Great post YBB.

Great post @yogibearbull.
Me and the missus have been together since we were kids. Back in the 70's-80's, she easily (and proudly for her) would have been on a Top 10 List nationally of spouses who had ZERO interest in all things financial, especially investments.
After all these years, that interest level of ZERO might now at least be a ONE or TWO.
Yeah, her interest level is still a challenge for me.
BUT, over all these years, I felt it was my duty and obligation to not concentrate on her interest level, but rather address her acumen by educating her on all things financial, especially investments.
So I did, albeit with her kicking and screaming in the early years!
And now, after ~50 years, despite still negligible interest, she is a walking, talking authority on US stock OEFs and ETFs and CDs (our investment vehicles of choice), well, at least the ones that are worthy of our investment dollars.
Leaving a written plan might help the dying spouse feel that they've done their part in the marriage. But good luck to the surviving spouse with all that, as yogi has so eloquently detailed.
Aside: We currently manage the portfolios of several friends and relatives, including two widows whose hubbies had left them written plans that they had ZERO interest or ability in following.
YMMV. As may your take on how this critical element should be handled.

Several people have mentioned that they plan to leave detailed written instructions for their spouses to follow.
I informally help several friends. IMO, those written instructions won't be effective.
A spouse who has not been interested in financial affairs won't have confidence to just follow what is written and may even fear that they don't understand the written instructions well.
They will find a trusted friend or a financial advisor.
I have seen other family dynamics at work as well. Recently widowed spouses want to keep some financial matters private - so they don't want to tell their kids about them. This view may change as they age and start to feel that they won't be around for long. It's for sociologists to figure out why, although I have guesses.
In a recent situation, when a friend's health has deteriorated, I did make the family aware of some financial details - maybe they knew or not, but my concern was that some accounts may become inactive or abandoned.

@dtconroe- Well sir, while I surely respect your thoughts on all of this, I must demur with respect to the "spousal" element of the conversation. From my many years of frequenting MFO I can confirm that this question is actually a very important one with respect to older investors, and one which has been discussed numerous times over the years.
I personally have a similar situation, and have attempted to simplify and structure our financial resources to accommodate my wife's abilities to deal with the various financial "systems" that must be involved. I'm always very interested to read about how others might handle this subject, as there's always something to be learned here.
Thanks for initiating this thread.
OJ

msf, you are absolutely correct! My Schwab assigned Personal Account Representative has previously informed me that there is a list of local FAs, that they can provide to me, if I want to work with someone locally. We have not gone down that path "yet", but we have discussed it as an option. The important thing for me is to involve my wife in these decisions, and to ensure she is part of the decision, whatever that may be. And concerning the "option" of switching my banking arrangement to an online experience with Schwab Brokerage, that has been discussed periodically on these financial forums in the past, and it has been adopted by a few posters I know very well. If it was just a decision I was making for myself, then I would look at it in more detail. But Banking in my situation, is always "joint" banking arrangements, and I always have my wife's input/participation in those decisions. We have been married over 50 years, and I know how frustrated my wife is with online financial processes, and she would never agree to online, joint banking systems. Just because it is possible to do it, does not mean it is something that you should do, especially if it will upset and be resisted by your wife.

If it seemed like I was pushing you to bank at a brokerage, I apologize. I was responding to a statement that banking should be left to banks. Since some brokerages capably provide most banking services, then if one's brokerage is convenient and if one is comfortable with this idea, banking and investing through one institution can simplify things.
FWIW, I see there is a fee-only advisory firm (via NAPFA) in Tyler that can work through Schwab. This is just a suggestion of something to explore if you haven't done so. Tyler does seem to be rather removed from much of the financial industry so as you stated, there aren't many options for face-to-face transactions.
People have been suggesting alternatives because bank-affiliated advisors may wind up costing more than independent advisors, in terms of fees, in terms of limited offerings, in terms of recommendations (conflicts of interest). Here's an old Forbes opinion piece that goes into this.
https://www.forbes.com/sites/robrussell/2016/01/18/should-you-trust-a-bank-with-your-investments/
That's not to say it is impossible to find a financial advisor at a bank who meets your needs. Just be careful. Given the stringent constraints you're working with (geography, wife's capabilities, comfort level, interest in brick and mortar) it sounds like you're doing the best you can.

DT, you know I like and respect you, but often it boils down to your wife and extremly limited options in a 10-mile radius.
What would happen if there was only one lousy bank and nothing else?
I think the best choices long term are mutual funds. If I'm gone, my wife has to drive to the local Schwab and meet with our local rep so he can sell all other funds and do the following.
Another possibility could be that I grow old and decide to implement it anyway. I can do it all online.
I'm not letting any bank (even not BofA + Merrill) or CU hold my money except 3-6 months cash.
In order to make my wife's investment decisions easier, I set up a written plan for her to invest in only 3 funds. I only trust 2 choices indexes + Vanguard funds managed by Wellington for long term hold. Wellington Management is the oldest, it's conservative, team style, and not one dominant manager, with a very cheap expense ratio. Since our money isn't with Vanguard, we would have to own the more expensive funds(not Admiral), but it's still cheap.
For a younger age, until age 75 and still having a taxable account...50% VWINX(40/60)...taxable=20% VWAHX(HY Muni)...30% VSMGX (60/40 invested in 2 US + 2 international indexes). Since HY Muni bonds are hybrid, this portfolio is more like 40/60.
Older than 70-75 or taxable account is gone: 40% VWINX(40/60)...30% VWEHX(HY Corp)...30% VSMGX(60/40). Since HY Corp bonds are hybrid, this portfolio is more like 35/65(stocks/bonds).
As long as I'm managing the portfolio, I will be using my style.

FD, what you and your wife do in the future is a private and personal issue, that you will have to resolve. Other poster opinions will be based on their unique situations. I am absolutely sure, my wife and I will go down our own unique path, and I am absolutely sure my wife would not be willing to tolerate a "written plan" that involved mutual funds that "I" trust, or would tolerate. She will live her life, with "her" tolerances, and based on some arrangement that she accepts. The type of situation that she most often quotes to me, is that of what several of our lifelong close friends have--they have a "financial advisor" who works for an investing firm. Our friends do not have the investing skills to perform self-directed investing decisions. My wife will need a professional to hold her hand, attempt to meet her financial wishes, and try to avoid investing decisions. Our friends will be her "support system", and I will be a "cherished memory" who is not available any longer to help her.
Now, the current topic has become the idea that it would be good to have all banking activities rolled into the brokerage umbrella that we have developed with Schwab. I know my wife, I know her needs, I know her frustration level, I know her financial skills, and I know what she would prefer. All she knows is banking activities, tied to local brick and mortar banks, located close to our residence. That is what our friends do with their banking as well, including a friend who uses Schwab for his investments. My wife would be very resistant if I tried to impose online banking, through Schwab brokerage. Others know what will work for them, maybe very different than my situation with my wife--that is fine and none of my business.

@dtconroe, I remember discussing this some years ago. At the time, you had indicated that Fido office was 2 hours away in Dallas, but there was a 2-3 person local Schwab broker/office - did that close?

Yes, it closed, and all the Schwab Account information was reassigned to a "new" personal account representative in the Dallas area. We had switched from a Fido office in Dallas, to the Schwab office in Tyler, for access and convenience for my wife. My wife was very willing to make the 10 minute drive to the Tyler Schwab office, to meet staff, and know who to meet with when necessary. When Schwab closed in Tyler, I was back to the same predicament we had with Fido. That is very frustrating regarding brokerage services for my wife, and I sure am not going to switch my local banking services to Schwab and further complicate financial access and convenience issues for my wife.
I may be more obsessed with a financial system, that is user friendly for my wife, than others are. If something happens to me, I don't want to leave an emotionally distraught spouse, struggling with a financial arrangement that is online, scary, and intimidating for her. I keep banking local and enough money in local banks, so she can take a 10 minute drive to the bank, and ask a local bank representative to "help" her make necessary changes to reflect my demise. She can't do that easily with Schwab, does not have the online skills to handle that, and does not want to make a 4 hour roundtrip drive to a Dallas office in very congested traffic.

In reading the various recent posts regarding banks and brokerages, I assume everyone's spouses have the skill sets, to do all the financial transactions online, without your direct assistance? With regard to Schwab, there is no local Schwab office where we live, so everything related to Schwab is online activity. When I have attempted to "train/educate" my spouse to be able to conduct online activities, she gets frustrated and upset, because it is not simple to her. Her response to my educational efforts with her is: "Just write it down and if something happens to you, I will try to call the toll free number and do my best to figure it out". We do have a designated person with Schwab, that we can contact for our Schwab account, and he has requested that we visit him at his office, to discuss brokerage account details--he is located 2 hours away in Dallas, in a very congested setting. Making a 4 hour round trip drive to Dallas to meet and talk to this Schwab representative is not a very appealing activity for my spouse or me.
My spouse is "old school", familiar with brick and mortar banks that are close and convenient, with a real person she can visit and talk with regarding financial matters. Doing that online is intimidating to her, is complicated to her, and it is scary to her. But everyone's situation is different, and maybe your spouses are comfortable and able to do that online independently, without your assistance when necessary.

Good point. My guess would be that 90% or more of the public lacks the skill-set evident regularly on this forum. I’m convinced that a few here trade C/Ds, stocks & ETFs in their sleep at night. Things not only your wife but most would be uncomfortable doing. Certainly there is a wide variance here as well - but most would appear far above the norm.
When I bought a new car a month ago, at first the local dealer balked at taking a check written on my Fido C/M account, preferring funds be wired. But it was the last day of the month (Saturday) and they were pushing to get the car out, so broke their house rules and accepted the check. Gosh - haven’t run into this before. I’ve never wired funds (at least in recent memory). I’d imagine it can be done online but might take an extra day?
I don’t write checks on the Fido C/M often. Mostly for large purchases, taxes, home infrastructure. I also keep a bit of cash in a TOD account at Fido just so I can keep the “invested” cash (part of overall portfolio) separate from that earmarked for near term expenses. Could be done on paper, but simpler this way. Easy to move the $$ back and forth. Up until a few months ago Fido defaulted cash into a lower interest rate offering. I think it was an FDIC insured bank account. But thanks to @msf’s comments and those of others here we have learned that there is now a way to bypass that default setting and have C/M and TOD accounts kept in a higher yielding money market fund.

In reading the various recent posts regarding banks and brokerages, I assume everyone's spouses have the skill sets, to do all the financial transactions online, without your direct assistance? With regard to Schwab, there is no local Schwab office where we live, so everything related to Schwab is online activity. When I have attempted to "train/educate" my spouse to be able to conduct online activities, she gets frustrated and upset, because it is not simple to her. Her response to my educational efforts with her is: "Just write it down and if something happens to you, I will try to call the toll free number and do my best to figure it out". We do have a designated person with Schwab, that we can contact for our Schwab account, and he has requested that we visit him at his office, to discuss brokerage account details--he is located 2 hours away in Dallas, in a very congested setting. Making a 4 hour round trip drive to Dallas to meet and talk to this Schwab representative is not a very appealing activity for my spouse or me.
My spouse is "old school", familiar with brick and mortar banks that are close and convenient, with a real person she can visit and talk with regarding financial matters. Doing that online is intimidating to her, is complicated to her, and it is scary to her. But everyone's situation is different, and maybe your spouses are comfortable and able to do that online independently, without your assistance when necessary.

@dtconroe,
I am requoting my previous post for reference. I never had any bad experiences with CUs when I was their customer.

I can endorse CU as financial institutions, especially for their excellent customer service. I have dealt with them over the years. I never had large enough invested with them to worry about their balance sheet or how NCUA works. It seems they get into trouble far less than regional / community banks. Do your DD.
In the interest of full disclosure, I stopped doing business with them when cyber attacks of US businesses became more prevalent. Just my luck, a few years after I closed my account, Patelco CU had a cyber attack and my info was compromised.

Use banks or CU for banking services. Use brokerages for brokerage banking services.
Why not use a brokerage for banking services?

In 1977, Merrill Lynch took a gamble with a concept known as a CMA (cash management account). This blending of banking and broker services into a one-stop-shop for financial services ...

https://www.sri.com/press/story/75-years-of-innovation-cash-management-account-cma/
Several brokerages offer cash management services. You can write checks and use a debit card from a Schwab brokerage account - you don't need Schwab bank for this.
https://www.schwab.com/content/how-to-order-new-debit-credit-card
You're not going to get a safe deposit box or take out a loan at a brokerage. But for your basic cash management and notary services, ISTM a brokerage can do just as well. And by using a brokerage for these services, that's one less account to have to deal with.

One should avoid bank or CU financial advisors. They typically have high commissions & push a narrow group of products or firms' own products.
A general salaried advisor at Fido or Schwab may offer better free, no obligation opinions.
Use banks or CU for banking services. Use brokerages for brokerage banking services.

Probably valid observations "in general" but would not work for my wife, in times of bereavement, in Tyler, Texas. I have to work with the cards I am dealt, including my wife's rigid resistance to travel 2 hours, to meet a stranger at a brokerage, that she has no history with. I have an opportunity to use this specific Financial Advisor, who my wife knows and trusts, and that has a much greater odds of succeeding. We can talk in generalizations all day long on these threads, but individual posters have to decide on what will work, for their specific circumstances

One should avoid bank or CU financial advisors. They typically have high commissions & push a narrow group of products or firms' own products.
A general salaried advisor at Fido or Schwab may offer better free, no obligation opinions.
Use banks or CU for banking services. Use brokerages for brokerage banking services.

It looks to me that a big CU is a better choice for safety. I use Penfed for their credit cards. It is federally insured by the National Credit Union Administration.
I would not select a small CU for large amounts of Certificate of Deposit to get a small extra %.
It's similar to MM. In a very risky market, I have used Fed MM and not the highest paying MM who can be locked.

FD, I have other "agendas" going on here beside the attractive Share Certificate/CD offering. I am trying to develop a "process" of setting up some local resources for my wife to use, in case I die and my wife needs to deal with financial life, in my absence. My wife hates investing, but loves CDs from experiences managing her parents CDs when they were at end of life. At the Kelley Credit Union, they happen to have a licensed Financial Advisor she would trust, because he is the son of an old friend she use to work with. For my own piece of mind, and to address some increasing anxiety my wife has with how to handle financial resources in my absence, this is a viable plan for her to learn more and be prepared to be successful without me.
These threads often have a lot more unique individual issues that impact each poster/investor, than just what asset products to use or not use, or what investing strategy will be the most productive.

I can endorse CU as financial institutions, especially for their excellent customer service. I have dealt with them over the years. I never had large enough invested with them to worry about their balance sheet or how NCUA works. It seems they get into trouble far less than regional / community banks. Do your DD.
In the interest of full disclosure, I stopped doing business with them when cyber attacks of US businesses became more prevalent. Just my luck, a few years after I closed my account, Patelco CU had a cyber attack and my info was compromised.

BaluBalu'
Thanks for your personal experience, and I am sorry for your bad experience. I totally agree with "Do your DD". I have never experienced issues with Credit Unions that you experienced, but just like Banks, Credit Unions should be researched. My "bad experiences" have occurred with Banks. Woodforest National Bank use to be my primary bank, until I experienced Identity theft issues. Someone got into my checking account information, wrote some huge and numerous bad checks over the course of just a couple of days, forcing me to file a Police Report, get a new Drivers License, and close my banking account. In the process of dealing with these issues, the local police department informed me that they had many similar problems with Woodforest National Bank and encouraged me to get a new bank with better security for depositor accounts. Of course, I experienced numerous "bank problems" during the 2007/2008 financial crisis, with several banks that went bankrupt and had to close--the most well known bank was the Countrywide Bank, where I had several CDs. Fortunately, my CD investments were okay with FDIC protections, but it took a little time to clean up the Countrywide mess! I did my Due Diligence on local credit unions in Tyler, and although I have been using another Credit Union (CASE Credit Union), it was not as good as Kelley Credit Union when it came to Share Certificates/CDs. As you said do your Due Diligence, and gather some quality information before making your financial decision.

I can endorse CU as financial institutions, especially for their excellent customer service. I have dealt with them over the years. I never had large enough invested with them to worry about their balance sheet or how NCUA works. It seems they get into trouble far less than regional / community banks. Do your DD.
In the interest of full disclosure, I stopped doing business with them when cyber attacks of US businesses became more prevalent. Just my luck, a few years after I closed my account, Patelco CU had a cyber attack and my info was compromised.